Then....And Now

I've been doing a lot of reflecting on the past few years lately. This trek to find a Master's Program has made me ponder on the decisions of when to go back to work, when to dive into a program of study, and when to just forget it all. I have been evaluating and re-evaluating what my life was like "back then" when I was working compared to now.

Then....I would grocery shop where ever and whenever I wanted to, not looking at prices, just getting what I thought we needed. Now....I strategically shop sales and have certain bargain things I only get at certain bargain stores.

Then....I never cut out a single coupon. Now....I'm disgusted to admit the amount of time this consumes. But, the $50+ savings every month has kept me going.

Then....the only books I ever read were textbooks and necessary reading for teaching. Now....I drive my husband crazy that I can't put down my latest novel.

Then....I never had a morning of coffee and chatting with my friends. Now....I still don't drink coffee, but I love the mornings when I can sit and chat with my friends.

Then....every spare moment was busy with lesson planning, grading, and meetings. Now....every spare moment is busy with picking up clutter, refereeing fights, and fixing the upcoming meal or snack.

Then....I had great adult conversation with colleagues on a daily basis. Now....let's just say I'm really thankful for cell phone minutes.

Then....I had moments where I felt like my job was overtaking my family. Now....I have moments where I feel like the computer and phone are overtaking my family.

Then....I got a paycheck once a month. Now....well, I don't.

Then....I wondered what my son was doing the whole time I was at work. Now....I wonder why my son is doing what he is doing and what discipline technique might work.

Then....I left by 7:00 every morning and saw my husband again sometime after 5:00. Now....he is only gone for four hours at a time.

Then....we could eat out when we didn't feel like scrounging up anything at home. Now....we take sack lunches with us even when we are heading to a town with perfectly good restaurants.

Then....I wore dresses five days a week. Now....I do well to get dressed five days a week.

Then....there was no such thing as shopping, running errands, or going to the library, between the hours of 7:00 a.m. - 5:00 p.m. M-F. Now....any day is potentially free game.

Then....I had good excuses for why the house wasn't clean. Now....I have to create good excuses for why the house isn't clean.

Then....I thought "if only I could stay home..." Now....I think "if only I could work a little bit..."

I know, the grass is always greener...