Two Years

My baby is 2 today.

Two years ago today I woke up with more anticipation, worry, excitement, stress, elation, and fear than I have ever felt in my life.

After a quick visit to the hospital, where we learned labor hadn't even really started, we ate breakfast at IHOP. I remember sitting there, eating my pancakes like it was any normal day in my life, thinking, "we are going to have a baby today." It blew my mind.

I was in another state, which felt like another country, waiting for another woman to progress through labor, so I could finally meet my precious baby boy. The day was the longest of my life. Hours ticked by as we sat in the waiting room at the hospital talking, reading, resting, laughing a little to try to calm our nerves, and praying for our baby's birthmother and her parents. They were in a room upstairs, but it felt like they were miles and miles away.

I remember trying to guess what it was going to be like when we walked into her room, what we would say, how everyone would act, and what our lives were going to be like for the next couple of days. And the next couple of weeks....and months...and years. We'd only met this beautiful girl and her parents 15 hours earlier. They had chosen us off of some pieces of paper. And they were preparing to hand over to us a beautiful baby boy. Only God can make pieces of a puzzle like that fit together in such an amazing way.

I will never forget the moment when her father walked into the waiting room with a subtle smile on his face. He said, "He's here, and he's perfect. Ten perfect fingers and ten perfect toes. You'll be able to come up in a few minutes." I was too overwhelmed to cry, too happy to laugh, too shocked to do anything at all.

When we walked into the room, her mother was holding a tiny bundle with a head full of black hair. She immediately placed the baby - their baby? her baby? our baby? - in my arms as she said with tears in her eyes, "He's beautiful." It was a powerful transition moment. Our baby. Our baby. We had been saying it for two months, and the moment had finally arrived.

I have never seen with my own two eyes such sacrificial love as that family showed as they held him, took pictures of him, and endured heart-wrenching goodbyes.

I can't believe two years have gone by. I want to hold on to each moment and each memory so I never forget the miracle of the journey.