If You Put Metal in the Microwave...

To the "tune" of If You Give a Mouse a Cookie...with significant literary license.

If you put metal in the microwave (even the silver paper-like metal that doesn't really look like metal)...
It still makes a really big fire-ball spark.

If you make a really big fire-ball spark,
You will scare yourself half-to-death.

If you scare yourself half-to-death,
Your hands will be shaking uncontrollably for a very long time.

If your hands are shaking uncontrollably for a very long time,
You will accidentally turn the burner up way too high.

If you accidentally turn the burner up way too high,
You will scorch the coconut oil and honey.

If you scorch the coconut oil and honey,
Your homemade granola bars will not be so delicious.

If your homemade granola bars are not so delicious,
You will wonder why you spend time cooking at home.

If you wonder why you spend time cooking at home,
You will drive to the local grocery store for granola bars.

If you drive to the local grocery store for granola bars,
You will save yourself medical bills, therapy bills, and a call to the local fire department.

The End.